I spent most of the day thinking about days to come, Chicago and then Manila. Packaged ramen because all we had in the house was ingredients, and then I climbed into my chair and took a nap. 

K. is taking O. and F. ice skating. I could barely handle them in the house, in O.’s room, door closed. My god. How do any of us have siblings. The door closed and locked and I put in some ramen and everything was quiet. 

I ate a bowl of ramen nervously in my apartment, waiting for it to be time for my webinar. I had been perched at the ready over my computer for like an hour and then when the time came I couldn’t get into the webinar room. Totally bizarre. It looked like I was late. I was super not late.

R. came to Brooklyn so we could hang out and chat away from Twitter and could try to reel her into doing some kind of feminist project with me. So many choices in the world, we went to the ramen place. I tried the vegetarian ramen since all the meat ramens are so gnarly and it was nice to just fearlessly slurp the whole bowl. Also it’s great to talk to somebody with kids now that I also have a kid. Feels good to be seen.

I ate a bowl of ramen in a blissfully empty house, in between reading my book.

Edit edit edit. I worked in 25 minute units, then I’d take a break and walk around, get back to it, delete everything I’d just produced. Is that normal? It took forever. But on my way, on my way. Stopped for ramen, the best I could do.

Frankly, I thought I’d earned it, this vast expanse of a Saturday afternoon, no kid in sight, just me and my books and maybe some laundry if I felt like it, naps, the whole shebang. It’s a good life, especially with a walk to the park for little league when I was ready.

I ate ramen while K. learned her dandelion greens lesson. Yuck, she said. Ramen is not enough when you’ve run twelve miles, but I’d pretty much been eating bagels all day. Time again to dial in my nutrition. Not there yet.

I ate a bowl of ramen and O. ate a turkey sandwich and we got ourselves fortified before heading out to the little league game. Athletes need to be properly fueled, that was the line I kept using to get that sandwich eaten. It totally worked. I am a genius.

With K. gone all weekend it was just me and O., came home and tried to soak in all the hours I could before picking O. up from school, it was just me on duty, all alone. It’s gotten more normal for sure, something I just do in the course of life, but still. The hours by myself, cling cling cling.